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World Traveler
by Mickey Buckwalter
I’m a Third World Junkie. I need to visit a Third World country at least every other year to maintain my sense of balance of what’s really important in life. Since my first trip to Southeast Asia I have spent 2 years and 9 months traveling in 26 Third World countries, much of it traveling alone using a backpack to carry my belongings.
My love affair with the Third world people began in 1990 at the age of 43. I traveled to Thailand for 10 days, trekked in Nepal for 3 weeks and spent a week in Hong Kong. The people there touched me so deeply that I knew I had to go back. Before leaving Kathmandu I said, “I’ll be back”. I didn’t realize just what those words would mean.
A year later I was on a plane with a one-way ticket to Nepal. I spent the next year traveling alone in Southeast Asia. I’d quit my job (they wouldn’t give me a leave of absence), sold my house (if I didn’t have a job, why come back to Iowa), put some things in storage, gave a lot away, and left with a backpack, a guide book, a camera and a lot of fear and wondering “why am I doing this?” This went against every value I had. I grew up with a strong work ethic in the conservative mid west and had bought into materialism. I had a beautiful house, a good paying job as a computer system’s analyst, security, a new car, and enjoyed the good life. It was hard for me to take the year and travel just for me and yet I knew I had to. The urge was stronger than all the fears and guilt. My parents were dead; I had no children, no one that depended on me. I was free to go.
As I was flying to Bangkok I felt free for the first time in my life. I realized how I’d let the house run me. I was thankful I didn’t get the leave of absence that I’d asked for. I already knew that I didn’t belong there anymore.
I didn’t realize consciously until years later just what drew me to go back. I wasn’t unhappy, and yet I knew something was missing and I identified it there. In Nepal the people were alive; their eyes sparkled. When I smiled at them they returned the smile and their whole face lit up. They enjoyed life and lived in the moment. When I asked them to do something, they did it immediately and with a smile. The porters carried 80 pounds using a tumpline. In the afternoon on short walking days they would leg wrestle, do headstands, play like children with no embarrassment. They made work fun, kidded each other, laughed, and touched each other. The men walked hand in hand as did the women. There was a freedom there that I didn’t feel in my own life. They had so little materially and yet I feel they are richer than most people in the US. At the end of 3 weeks we were a real family.
By traveling alone I met more people, both locals and fellow travelers. I was more approachable and I had to reach out to others for companionship. I learned as much from my fellow travelers as I did from the people in the countries I visited. Many of them were from Europe, England, Australia, and New Zealand. I met very few Americans.
I felt safe traveling. The fears I had, and there were a lot, were always of the “next place”, the future. Yet once I was there I wasn’t afraid and everything was great. I learned to ask “what do you mean by …..” when talking to people. I found out their definition of difficult and many other things were different than mine. I learned to ask specific questions. I felt that the Europeans were fearless compared to me.
I’m a traveler rather than a tourist. I travel slower and with a general itinerary that changes as I travel. I’m treated as a local when in areas where the tourists don’t go. I meet the ordinary people. Many don’t speak English and we communicate without words. It’s amazing how much I found out through gestures and facial expressions. Some were as curious about me as I was about them. I sat and drank a can of pop in one village and many of the people, adults as well as children, gathered around and just watched me. I know what it feels like to be in a zoo.
I’ve found that all people really want the same things in life.
Their dress and customs are different which is what draws me to them. In the heart, we are all the same. They need food, shelter, and clothing. They want a better future for their children and do what they can to get them an education. In some places they don’t feel girls need an education. My dad felt that I didn’t need to go to college because I’d get married and stay at home.
Women encouraged me along the way. In Thailand I had lunch with a local woman whom I’d met on the street my first day in Bangkok. She made sure I didn’t order really spicy food. She asked if I was married or had children. I said no to both and she gave me the thumbs up even though those things are extremely important in her culture. She then asked if I was traveling alone, not on a tour or with another person. I answered that I was alone and traveling independently. Again she gave me thumbs up. I needed that encouragement as I was starting on that adventure. In the Singapore airport restroom, the woman attendant looked at me, looked at my luggage, a backpack and a duffel, looked at me and gave me a smile and nod. From both of these women I got the feeling of “we can’t do what you’re doing and we support you. Do it for us too.” There were many other women and men who befriended me along the way.
When traveling alone for extended periods of time especially out of the US, I find out who I really am; the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s allowed me to make conscious decisions about my life and that I’m really capable of doing more than I thought I was. I can do anything I set out to do.
I came back from that first year in Asia knowing that the world is a great big, wonderful, beautiful, safe place. Nepal proved to be dangerous to my life style. It changed my life forever. I went back to work on contract for my former employer for 7 months. Otherwise I haven’t held a regular job since April 1991. My life has been turned upside down and I’m grateful.
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